As a TV recap writer and an author, I get to meet a broad spectrum of amazing people. Some are best-selling authors and some are passionate TV fans. Some of the TV fans are also writers of fan fiction and they are just as talented as the authors I know! In fact, I have read some fan fic pieces that brought me to tears more than any book ever has.
There are so many talented fan fic writers and I sort of stumbled into the Teen Wolf area of that world recently. After reading a bunch, I was delighted, impressed and inspired. I decided to join in on the fun and try my hand at a Teen Wolf inspired series of fan fics called "Grave Confessions."
(All character rights to MTV, obvi!)
Here is the first one! (Sorry for any typos.)
Part One: Stiles
My name is Allison Argent and I am dead.
I repeated it once more, this time out loud, or at least I thought it was out loud. Repeating it made it easier to remember when things got fuzzy. And the longer I was gone, the fuzzier it got.
My name is Allison Argent and I am dead.
It was always hard to tell if the thoughts in my head ever actually left my lips. Really, it was hard to tell anything anymore but the one glaring fact of it all was that I wasn’t alive. No matter how alive I felt. I had died in the arms of my first love, while protecting my friends.
I died, but I wasn’t gone.
I should have known that death in Beacon Hills wouldn’t be as simple as a bright, white light but at least it was peaceful. I was never quite sure where I was when I wasn’t at my grave, but I knew it was warm and safe, just like Scott’s arms.
Scott. That was something that never got fuzzy. The memories of my life remained strong. It was the concept of time and place that got hazy for me now and then.
Maybe it was this town or maybe my last name but I wasn’t able to leave it all behind. Not permanently anyway. Even as I hypothesized reasons why my spirit remained in Beacon Hills, I knew the answer. My friends. And my Dad. My fight had ended but theirs was still raging on and they still needed me.
Stiles. My most frequent visitor, after my dad, of course.
Stiles fiddled with his key ring as his blue, plaid shirt caught the wind and billowed out behind him. He cleared his throat as he tightened his fingers around a cluster of white flowers in his other hand. Little clumps of dirt fell from the stems as he set the clearly stolen flowers down at the base of my headstone.
He stood back up sharply and wiped his hand on his shirt. He always looked uneasy when he first got here, no matter how many times he had visited. Not nervous though, more sad and guilty. And he always brought flowers.
“I took them from Coach,” he said softly with a chuckle. “He planted a garden, can you believe that? The guy can hardly keep himself alive, so I did those flowers a favor, if you ask me.”
Thank you, Stiles.
He tucked his keys in the front pocket of his jeans and took a seat on the dewy grass.
“So, um. Your dad is good. He’s, uh…he’s actually really good. And dating Scott’s mom, believe it or not,” he raised his eyebrows. “I hope that’s not weird for you. I mean, he seems happy. They both do actually.”
I smiled. Good. They deserve to be happy.
He titled his head as he gazed at my headstone, not speaking for a bit. It was these quiet moments that made me ache for life. He needed my comfort but all I could do was listen.
“It’s this weekend.” He nodded as he picked his thumb nail with his index finger.
“Graduation. Yep, high school is over.” He paused. “Lydia went to get a new dress. Personally, I don’t see why you need a new anything because you have to wear a robe over it, but you know Lydia.”
He smiled brightly. He always smiled like that when he mentioned Lydia. He let out a long, happy sigh.
He touched his finger to his temple like he had just remembered something. “Oh, and I’m sorry I haven’t been here in a while. It’s a … real long story but I was gone. I was gone and I didn’t think I’d ever get back but they did it. Scott, Lydia and Malia. They found a way,” Stiles said. “I know that I will never know what it feels like for you, not really, but now I know what it’s like to feel lost and I just want you to know that we won’t ever forget you Allison. Okay? We will never forget you.”
“And Scott doesn’t talk about it, but I know he thinks about you every single day. It’s just hard for him to come here, to face you.” Stiles explained. “Scott doesn’t deal with death very well, not that anyone does but I promise you, he has not forgotten you. It’s just, I’ve been coming to this cemetery for so long, that it feels normal to me. But that’s just me.”
The truth was, Scott hadn’t been here since my funeral. He stood at the gates of the cemetery many times but he didn’t come in. I understood why.
“It’s hard. He still loves you, Allison.” Stiles half smiled and picked a blade of grass to spin between his fingers. He always did that.
Two tears escaped his eyes but he kept his face angled to the ground. “When I was stuck in that stupid terminal, I kept thinking about you. About what it must feel like for you. Ya know, to be a memory. And I am so sorry for that. I am so sorry.”
He always said he was sorry. Sometimes he would start with it. Sometimes he would end with it but every time Stiles came to visit me, he apologized for my death.Every time and I think that's why he came here so much. I had spent more time alone with Stiles in death than I ever had in life.
I don’t blame you, Stiles.
He wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt. “Lydia says it’s not my fault and that I need to forgive myself but if I had just been stronger, I could have stopped the Nogitsune before all of that happened and you’d still be here with us. Lydia said it would get easier with time, but after feeling like I was gone for good, I just can’t. And now with graduation … you should be here. You should be here with us. You deserve to be back, more than me.”
He got quiet again. As he shifted on the grass, his phone buzzed. “It’s Lydia. She said she found a dress. And she, uh, she put all these hearts after it.”
Stiles turned the phone toward my headstone to show me.
That smile spread on his face again. “She loves me. Lydia Martin loves me.” He shook his head. “No matter how many times I say it or hear her say it, it doesn’t sound real.”
I laughed. I knew for a long time how Lydia felt about Stiles. It was about time she did too.
I could see the joy in his face as he spoke about her. Butterflies. I did miss that.
“I have to go pick her up now,” he said. “We miss you Allison. I miss you.”
Stiles stood and flicked away the blade of grass he was holding. “I have to go pick up my girlfriend Lydia Martin. Lydia Martin, who is my girlfriend.”
There’s that smile again.
He started walking toward his Jeep but stopped and spun on his heel to face me one more time.
“And I will get him here. I promise.” Stiles pulled out his keys. "For both of you."
I believe you.
And then he was gone. It was just me and the quiet again.